BEWARE!

So, despite the fact that I have nothing of real importance to say in this post, I do have something slightly humorous. The other day I was driving down a familiar road in Ohio when I glaced over into a nearby yard. Now, you may be asking, "Why were you even looking into this person's front yard?" Well, from the time I was very young I have looked specifically at this house for no other reason than pure entertainment. I'm not sure if the same people live there that did when I was a child, but no matter whether it was the same family or not, the house itself seems to carry an element of outlandishness. Other than the fact that it looks as if it has been added onto several times despite the lack of finances to hire a professional, it always seems to have something comical in the yard itself. For many years now it has been the home of a stone pig. Why they chose to buy a statue of a pig instead of the typical lion, I couldn't say. Nor could I tell you why they placed it in the dead center of their continually dying grass. Nonetheless, that pig has been there ever since I can remember. You would think that as the seasons go by the pig would lose its novelty. However, the owners of said pig must have had the same thought because they dress this fat little piggy in different clothes depending on the season. At halloween, for instance, I have seen it as a witch, spider, and pig ghost among other things. Sufice it to say that no matter what else is going on in my life, every time I travel down this road my eyes instinctively turn to the house with its piggy. Well, this day as I glanced over to see the new fashion of my pig friend, I noticed something else in the yard. It was a sign that from my memory of these types of signs, looked just like the one you see below.
However, I had to look twice. Was it just my dyslexia playing tricks on me? No...no...it wasn't. Somehow these people had been able to change the sign so that it no longer told people to beware of a dog. Now, the only other thing that I could think they would possible be warning others of was their stationary, ever-changing pig. But I was wrong. It actually read, "BEWARE OF GOD." After I read this, I got a mental image of God being cooped up in this bizzare house, and thought, "God must live here, since they have posted a sign to "beware" of him." This thought, however, didn't disturb me nearly as much as the one that followed. "By using logic, the only place God would live is heaven, and if that house is heaven, then that means the pig must be St. Peter....wierded out!!!"

Alcohol?

Well, as most of you know (or should know if you're reading this), my 21st birthday is coming up! Yep...on January 27th I will officially be legal. This phrase, though fitting, has always bothered me. After all, I don't recall reading anywhere that anyone below this age is illegal, and if they are then the police are doing a worse job than I originally thought. Anyway, I will hopefully be celebrating this step from illegal inhabitation in the United States to new found freedom with a party. I know, I know..most of you must be thinking..wow, what an original idea, right? Well, it just so happens that this is a rare ocassion for me. Not that I don't have a birthday every year just like everyone else, but a celebration of said birthday is rare. I can honestly say that I haven't had a real party for my birthday since before I was fifteen years old. So, as you can imagine, I am really looking forward to my birthday this year. I do have one concern though, and that is the alcohol. You see, I believe that alcohol has it's time and place and amount. However, it just so happens that the only amount I am able to consume and still be able to have complete recall of all the events that took place the night before is half a glass of wine. That's right my friends, I have probably the lowest tolerance level of anyone I know. This is actually disappointing to me for several reasons. One of these reasons obviously being that I am unable to "drink with my friends" on my birthday because if I drank half the amount they did I'd be 100% gone. Secondly, I go from normal Meg to laughing, loud, crazy Meg in about a fourth of the time that it takes everyone else to get there. Therefore, I more than anyone else appear the fool because everyone else is still in a normal mindset. I'm not saying that I wish to become drunk on my birthday, quite the contrary. My problem is in order to save face and remember my first birthday in over five years I must refuse the alcohol. This, no doubt, makes me a little sad...but I will be bringing my camera and am excited to see everyone else plastered--thereby taking at least a few black mail pictures which can't hurt in the future. So, I guess it won't be a total waste!